Expert Q&A: Engage Celebrants
What inspired you to become a wedding
celebrant?
I decided to become a celebrant when I was planning my son's naming
day. I've always believed in the important role ceremonies play in
building strong families and communities and I love meeting new
people. I also have to admit to being a little wedding obsessed! I
love to hear people's stories of how they met and how they fell in
love. Every couple is different and you get to meet some amazing,
creative people. I have a background in public speaking, so
becoming a marriage celebrant seemed like a natural fit.
What was the most memorable wedding ceremony you've
officiated?
My first wedding ceremony was very special. It was for my husband's
cousin and his now wife. They wanted a relaxed ceremony that
reflected who they were. The setting was stunning - it was on a
large balcony overlooking the ocean - and the ceremony was full of
laughter and a few tears. In general, I also love when couples
choose to write their own vows and keep them secret from each
other. Watching their expressions as they hear their spouse's
words, straight from the heart, gives me goose bumps every
time.
What advice would you give a couple searching for a good
celebrant?
There are literally thousands of celebrants to choose from, but to
find the one exactly right for you, start looking early and once
you've found your perfect celebrant, book them! Most popular
celebrants are booked up to 12 months in advance. Apart from word
of mouth, it can be hard to know how to select your celebrant. See
if they have a video of them in action you can watch, or at least
some photos or testimonials, so you can get a feel of how they'll
help you on your big day. Once you've narrowed down your list, try
to meet with one or two and talk a bit about your ceremony, what
service they offer and what their fees include. Choose a celebrant
you click with - you're going to be sharing some very personal
details with this person so you want to enjoy the process.
What ways can a couple make their wedding ceremony
personal?
Share as much information as you can with your celebrant, even if
it isn't directly relevant. One of the most personal ceremonies
I've written was for a couple who brought along love letters,
emails to each other and pictures of their puppies. Everything you
tell your celebrant won't necessarily end up in your ceremony (but
it's worth making sure you get to run through the whole thing prior
to your big day!). However, your stories will help your celebrant
understand who you both are, how you feel about each other and why
you're getting married.
I also encourage couples to have a go at putting together their own
vows. Although some are very creative and talented, heartfelt vows
don't have to be written from scratch. Often the words of others,
perhaps with some minor changes, really reflect how you feel about
your soon-to-be spouse.
Are there any big no-nos?
Don't include lots of readings and rituals unless they really mean
something to you. The average ceremony goes for about 25 minutes. I
did have one couple whose ceremony went for 45 minutes. It had
several readings, some very long vows and two rituals. But
everything in it was a true reflection of this couple and the
guests were enchanted from start to finish.
Also, don't try to make your celebrant scrap the legal monitum and
vows. Although the language is quite formal and some don't like the
definition of marriage, both must be stated to ensure your marriage
is valid!
One last tip?
If you have young children at your ceremony, think about getting
some bubbles. These will keep the little ones (and some of the
bigger ones) entertained while you sign the register (usually the
point in the ceremony where there's a bit of a break and kids start
to look for distractions), and they'll look fantastic in your
photos.
For more info, check out www.engagecelebrants.com.au.
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