Racing on the rumour mill
Term of the month: Rumour Racing
Still scrambling to spill the gossip first? Seems the name of the game is: you snooze, you lose social status.
When the news came through that Heath Ledger had passed away I was at a breakfast function. A phone beeped, and there was a gasp. “Heath Ledger’s dead!” It was, oooh, maybe five minutes after the news had broken it nationally... and then another girl piped up, “Yeah, I know. So sad.”
I was shocked. Immediately I texted my best friend and also boyfriend. Boyfriend hit back with, “I know, sad huh?” Best friend came back with, “I know, how sad...It’s a Princess Di moment.”
I was now not only super shocked about the death, but in shock. How, how did they know this so soon? I shouldn’t have been so surprised. News, rumour and gossip now possess their own brand of speed. And as it surpasses both the speed of light and sound, it makes things extra- difficult when you prefer giving, not receiving, gossip.
Yep, forget skimming the newspaper – checking gossip sites and blogs to see what’s fresh in Celebrity Land’s the new before-work ritual. See, we need to stay in touch with those who know the gossip first on a macro-scale, so we can be the ones to report it on a micro-scale, whether that’s at the office or within friendship circles.
No prizes for second place...
Now you have to now the latest gossip to get people’s attention. And you’ve gotta know it pretty much the nanosecond it happens, coz if everyone already knows the news, you just look out-of-touch.
But why do we panic if we get some salacious gossip or the hot new YouTube clip, and cant resend it that second because our inbox is full? Well, it’s less about the fodder and more about the need to report. And report first. After all, what’s more enticing than being able to say to Emma, “So... did you hear about Jill?”, when you know Emma most definitely has not heard about Jill. She in the know equals hero. She is the Great Holder of Knowledge.
Is winning really about losing?
Ultimately, gossip is a form of lady one-upmanship. Men have footy and plasma TVs to illuminate prowess within their gender- we have the Rumour Race, Celebs aside, if you know the big news within your social/family circle first, you clearly have good moral fibre to be trusted with the knowledge and brilliant sources. It’s a status symbol. The verbal equivalent of Gucci bag. Or is it a fake Gucci bag? Is the practice of spreading stories – malicious or not – really so admirable? Is it as empowering as we believe it to be? Probably not.
Yes, providing verbal kerosene gives a thrill, but next time someone beats you to the punch, just let it go. It doesn’t matter. Life is so fast now that by the time the Internet, SMS and email have done their work, news is old on around three minutes, anyway. You’re far better off impressing your friends by reading Cosmo and entertaining them with clever new terms...