18.02.2010
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10 steps for an easy breakup
Facts are facts – break-ups aren’t fun, and are generally pretty painful. Here are ten ways to make the process a little easier.
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10. Be positive. You will reach closure, you will be happy again, and you will find someone else. Even though it seems like the end of the world, it’s not, and it’s your chance for a new beginning. Be true to yourself and see it as an opportunity for personal growth. -
9. Rebound. Going on the rebound doesn’t necessarily mean one-night stands, but certainly consider distracting yourself by embracing all the new attention you’re getting! Allow yourself to be dragged out by your friends and have the time of your life- anything to distract you from thinking about your ex. -
8. Retail therapy. If all else fails, fill the void temporarily by burning some cash. Don’t go crazy (you don’t want to start your new single life with major credit card debts) but make sure you treat yourself. Buy an item of clothing you love that your partner hated- high waisted shorts, anyone? -
7. Spring clean. Breaking up means the end of the relationship, but it also means a new beginning for you. Start fresh by cleaning out and organising your personal space, ready for your new, easier life. If you have items your partner may have bought you, there’s nothing wrong with keeping them. Just put them away for a while, until you’ve given yourself time and space. -
6. Look good, feel great. Get a haircut, join a gym, and revel in the fact that the best revenge is living well. A makeover is the perfect way to cheer yourself up and lift your spirits. You deserve it! -
5. Put it in perspective. Although you might hate to hear it, there are other fish in the sea. And the feelings you have right now will pass. In the meantime, do something good: volunteer at an animal shelter or offer to raise money for charity. While your life may have taken a detour, there are always others who are less fortunate that will put your situation into perspective. -
4. Up and at ’em! Ultimately, focussing all your energy and emotions on a situation you don’t have the power to change is a waste of time. Turn it into positive energy by doing something you’ve always wanted to do. Start a blog, join a dance class, learn another language. The only person who can hold you back now is you. -
3. Be realistic about your ex. Every break-up has a reason behind it. Learn from your mistakes (even though it might make you feel better by focussing on his!). If you broke up with him, don’t look back on the relationship with rose-coloured glasses. Remember why you broke up, and accept the situation. -
2. Cut all ties. Every last one. At this stage, “staying friends” probably isn’t going to work, and the longer you attempt to contact him and be friends, the longer your pain will stick around. If it’s the other way around and your ex asks to see you, ask yourself what the point is. Be honest with yourself and give each other space. -
1. It’s fine to cry. Fergie may claim that “big girls don’t cry”, but when it comes to a break-up, this rule is definitely overridden. Give yourself a week or two to embrace what you’re feeling. Cry, shout, do whatever it takes to get your emotions out. Accept that this is how you feel.
10. Be positive. You will reach closure, you will be happy again, and you will find someone else. Even though it seems like the end of the world, it’s not, and it’s your chance for a new beginning. Be true to yourself and see it as an opportunity for personal growth.
