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Dating queen

12:48PM, Jan 18, 2013
Don't know what to say or do? Then you NEED to read our ultimate guide to the perfect date...

Dates are ridiculously stressful affairs fuelled by the constant questions whirling around in your head: “Do I like you?” “Are you into me?” “Is there something in my teeth?” And the anxiety is only heightened by the awareness that a few wrong moves could spell game over. Goodbye potential soul mate. So how do you become a master dater? With a few tips from Cosmo of course.

How to be an awesome date:

Tell a good tale. Have a funny and maybe a little embarrassing story you can use as an ice breaker.

Make up your mind. Don’t “um” and “ah” about what you want to eat for hours or seem overly fussy (“I don’t eat anthing that’s come from the sea or land, except for turkey breast and I only eat vegetables that are green” – you get the picture!. Your dinner buddy is going to envision every dinner being a struggle thereafter. Don’t be a princess, eat up!

Don’t be a bossy boots, but make a decision if he throws the ball in your court. If you’re happy to go with the flow, that’s one thing; but if he asks what you want, don’t just waffle. It’s not cute to simper and be all “I don’t knooooow”. You have a brain in your head, prove it by using it.

Listen. You’re not filming This Is Your Life. A good conversationalist (and date) knows how to listen. Note: there is a difference between listening for the opportunity to jump in and genuinely taking in what your date is saying. Aim for the latter, prove show you are genuinely interested in what he has to say.

Ask as many questions as you answer. An addendum to the above, this is a great rule for helping you strike a balance.

Find common ground. If conversation stalls, look for mutual interests, whether it’s books, movies or Siamese cats.

Curl your hair. People with curly hair come off as more easy-going and care-free. It doesn’t hurt to come across more approachable on the first meet-up, right?

Don’t talk about the Ex. Seriously, not one word. Zip it!

If you don’t know anything about a topic, don’t pretend you do. It will only backfire later and make you feel like an idiot and look like a liar.

Don’t get too drunk. Getting messy isn’t attractive behaviour and you will be far less charming than you think.

Don’t get too loud. If you’re nervous don’t overcompensate by being too gregarious. You want to aim for fun-loving, not rowdy.

Getting messy isn’t attractive behaviour and you will be far less charming than you think.

Don’t be rude to the staff or taxi drivers. They don’t deserve to get your attitude and you will come off as obnoxious.

Don’t hit on the staff. While we’re on the subject of staff, sexing them with your eye is equally as awkward.

How to set up the perfect date

Choose a venue that has a good buzz, with a fun crowd. You want to the energy of the night to help create a good atmosphere.

Don’t choose a place that’s too loud to hear each other. If you just sit there blindly nodding and randomly laughing, you’re probably going to mess it up by giggling when he is telling you about his dead dog. Oops. Make sure you can both hear each other without screaming.

Go somewhere interactive. If you choose a venue that has crazy dress up, weird menus or live music, you will be able to keep the conversation lively. When you’re done grilling each other about your lives you can discuss everything else going on around you.

Don't choose a place that is too quiet or overly intimate. You have to strike a fine balance. Too quiet or intimate and you can find yourself can become more laboured when you’re stuck on one topic - each other.

Have a plan for moving on if your date is going well. You don’t want to halt a date just when it’s heating up, but if you both get stuck on the street corner trying to decide the next step; it can end up fizzling out.

Don't go dine somewhere too specific like vegan stir-fry street food, unless your date suggests it. You don’t want to find out they don’t eat seafood at a fish-based restaurant. Mod Oz is a safe bet because restaurants usually offer a range of flavours and foods.

What are your first date secrets?

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