Sex

Casual sex = no orgasm

No strings sex was meant to be fun, right? But a new study is saying that for women, it ain’t so…

By: Edwina Carr
Casual sex

When you think of casual sex, you think of spontaneous, do it anywhere, clothes-tearing lovin’, right? But it turns out that for ladies, these passionate encounters, well, aren’t that passionate after all.

A study conducted by the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University and researchers at Binghamton University has found that women are twice as likely to orgasm (from sex and oral sex) when they’re in a relationship compared with when they’re having a casual booty call.

And here we were thinking long-term-couple sex was way more yawn-worthy than a passionate one-time romp!

A similar study led by Dr Paula England at New York University researched 24,000 university students over five years and found that only 40 percent of chicks got to O Town from their last sexual encounter, whereas 80 percent of guys did. Basically – women don’t get as much out of casual sex as men do and that is SO not OK in our books.

So why exactly are us womenfolk lagging well behind men on the enjoy-o-meter when it comes to doing the deed? Well for starters, the study found that men aren’t as focused on pleasing chicks when it’s just a casual sex session (it’s all for one and one for all, ladies).

But that’s not the only thing holding us back from climaxing; apparently we need to feel comfortable. “Women often need to feel safe to really enjoy sex,” explains sex and relationship expert Isiah McKimmie.

“Also, women can struggle to ask for what they really want during sex. Over the years women have been shamed for enjoying sex and we worry that if we communicate what we want, we’ll be seen as too pushy or that we’ll offend his feelings.”

Noted: ask for what you want, ladies! Another thing? Don’t feel bad about not being able to come. “About 30 percent of women struggle to orgasm so don’t put pressure on yourself. There’s nothing wrong with you and you should seek professional help to deal with it,” explains Isiah.

If you’re looking to up your chances of reaching the big O from your casual hook-ups, there is a way. “It takes a while to learn what each other likes and how your bodies work together,” explains Isiah.

“The best thing you can do is explore on your own what you like and what makes your body feel good so that when you’re with someone else, you can communicate exactly what you want.”

  • Author: Edwina Carr