Last week I had the legitimate fear that I would be killed in some horrific murder and the police would have to search my things for evidence, find my laptop and then discover that I am addicted to porn. So in case that does happen, let me take this opportunity to tell you, Mr Police Officer, I am not actually addicted to porn at all, I was looking at all those movies because I had to. For work. Yes Mr Police Officer, I am telling the truth!
You see, I’d scored a coveted interview with James Deen, a porn star in town for Sexpo. So, as I do with all interviews, I set about researching him and quickly realised, when I typed his name into Google and 13.5 million search results came up, he's a big deal. In fact, he has an IMDB page Chris Hemsworth would be jealous of, if Chris wanted to star in films such as Babysit my Ass, A Big Tit Christmas, Butsty Cops On Patrol, The Naughty Cheerleaders Club (Parts 1, 2, 3, 3, 5 or 6), Slutty and Sluttier or... I'll stop there because James has actually stared in more than 1400 films (I didn’t get to watch all of them). He's even directed 11, been in a (non-porno) film with Lindsay Lohan, and nabbed the crown of “Male Performer of the Year by Adult Video News” in 2009 when he was just 22, making him the youngest actor ever to win.
He also has a fan base to rival Chris’, it consists of hundreds of thousands of men and women. He’s like Tim Tams of the porn world – everybody just loves him. And I can see why. He’s… lovely! And his views on sex are so not what you would expect from a pornstar. They're actually very sweet.
Here is the interview in its entirety – including me being super awkward at the beginning because our interview time got changed and I didn’t realise the PR had organised for him to call me...
My mobile phone starts ringing while I’m making a cup of tea…
Hello, Harriet speaking…
Hi Harriet, it’s James.
Um, James Deen…
Oh, James! You’re calling me! I wasn’t expecting you to be on the other end of the line…
Yeah, I was at the phone and it was ringing and now we’re talking so that worked out well! [laughs]
Modern technology is amazing isn’t it?
Alexander Graham Bell was a bad ass! I mean he’s not my favourite, but as far as inventors go he did do some cool stuff.
I know. He’s managed to make us connect, which I’m very excited about. And I’m actually really glad that I’m not doing this in person because I can already feel that I’m blushing…
You know, it’s ok. I blush when I talk about Alexander Graham Bell too.
Haha! That’s funny! Ok, so anyway, you’re here for Sexpo and it’s your first time to Australia, but I’m guessing you've slept with some Aussie women either in a, um, professional or, er, non-professional… manner?
Yeah, I have done a few scenes with some Australian women and they’ve always been amazing, and so far every person I’ve met here has been pretty awesome… there are definitely some serious beauties in Australia.
Do we do anything differently in bed, you know, compared with other cultures?
Well in my experience I would say no. But I haven’t had sex with every woman in Australia yet. So I guess I've got some work to do to answer that question.
Haha, yes you do. So I’ve read you wanted to be a pornstar since you were in kindergarten and when you first started out, you got your gigs because you didn’t look like your average pornstar… I want to know how you found the confidence to have sex on screen when you knew you weren’t typical looking?
It never really occurred to me. Like, that thought never really entered my mind. I was always just myself and did things as me. When I first started it wasn’t a matter of, “Oh I don’t look like everybody else.” I was just like, “Oh yeah cool I’m going to do some scenes…” And I did.
So do you think that’s the secret to being good at sex? Just to be yourself?
Being yourself is definitely important, but I always think that communication is a little more important. Being able to communicate to other people about what you’re into and find out what they’re into is going to help your sexual experience. Sex isn’t something you do to someone, it’s something you do with someone.
That’s sounds so sweet! So is there a particular move that a girl can do in bed that you think is a winning move?
No, because everybody’s different. You’ve got to approach it from your partner’s perspective. So if a woman is with a specific guy and that specific guy likes a specific thing, then that thing is a winning move. But what’s going to be a winning move for him might not be the same for someone else.
So kinda what you’re saying is, there’s no such thing as someone who’s bad in bed, it's just a matter of communicating?
The only advice I can really give to anybody in regards to sex is really just pay attention to your partner. You’re in a group activity, you’re not masturbating. Pay attention to how they breathe, their moans, what their mouth does - these things will show if they’re enjoying themselves. And I know it can be hard to say what you want, it’s normal to get shy sometimes. I still get shy before every single time I have sex. Even on camera. Before every single scene I still get nervous.
Really?! That's oddly endearing to know! On another note, how do you think porn can help a relationship?
I think - depending on the individual - adult films can be used to, you know, spice-up your love life. They can be used as entertainment, as an educational tool and as a communication tool. If there’s something in a porno that you want to try, you can go, ”Hey what do you think about that?” and see what their opinion is about it. You can you use it for all sorts of things!
And my final question is how would your friends describe you?
I don’t know. I don’t sleep much so they’d probably say that.
How many hours of sleep do you get a night?
Like three or four.
From having sex?
Haha, not always!