Sex

Do braingasms exist?

How enriching your sex life can be a case of mind over matter.

By: Emma Markezic

The general pool of thought surrounding female orgasms is that there are two kinds – vaginal and clitoral. Which totally neglects the idea of mental orgasms.

Because they are hard to measure and therefore prove, the idea of the mindgasm is often disregarded. But we beg to differ.

This enigmatic orgasm can come into play at any time, anywhere. One of the most common scenarios happens super early in a relationship. You sit around (at your desk, on the bus) daydreaming about the date you had last night, and reliving every time his skin brushed yours till your head practically explodes with lustful imaginings.

It’s when just thinking about the act is enough to leave you wriggling in your seat, with a flush on your cheeks and a grin on your gums. Sometimes it’s deliberate, like when you spend the previously mentioned imaginary solo time with Ryan Gosling. And sometimes it’s accidental – like when the coffee guy bends over to get you an extra spoon. But it’s totally a thing. Holy guacamole, is it a thing. In fact, it’s practically the reason porn exists.

And here’s why: if your mind isn’t into it, your muscles won’t be either. For a truly satisfying orgasm, your brain needs to climax before your body can. Not only that, but some women (Lady Gaga included) claim they can bring themselves to orgasm through thought power alone. Brain imaging scanners have proved it’s possible – the pleasure centre of the brain lights up in the exact same way whether the stimulation is mental or physical.

But wait, there’s more. In the same camp sits the dream orgasm – essentially the female version of the wet dream. Doctors refer to it as a “nocturnal emission”, and while that sounds decidedly as though it’s the name of a heavy metal band, it will happen to almost half of all women at some point in their lives.

Sexpert Nikki Goldstein confirms to Cosmo that these kinds of braingasms are a real life thing. (Told ya.)

“It is physically possible to have a mental orgasm and we have research and case studies to prove it,” she says.

“It isn’t as common as vaginal or clitoral orgasms as it takes a certain amount of mental and maybe even spiritual clarity to get there.

“In a busy life, people will always go for what's quickest and easiest and for many that is a clitoral or vaginal stimulation resulting in an orgasm.”

So next time you’re ensconced in sexy time, let your synapses do the walking and see if you notice a difference. Heck, even when you’re not ensconced in sexy time, give it a burl….

“The first step to reaching a mental orgasm is viewing orgasms in a different way and looking beyond the physical direct stimulation,” Nikki advises.

“The physical stimulation triggers the brain so why can't the brain trigger the brain? Meditation, breathing exercises and of course tantra are the best paths for people wanting to explore a mental orgasm.”

Books into meditation class…

  • Author: Emma Markezic