Do we need a refresher course in sex?

Think you're a pro at the ol' two-sheet tango? Think again...

Being a sex and relationship journalist, I’m often greeted with lovely gifts from PRs falling through my letter box. This week, I’ve been the lucky (?) recipient of chocolate bath foam, an ex-boyfriend voodoo doll and a 3D (yes, 3D!) DVD teaching you ‘how to have the best sex of your life’. The Lovers’ Guide 3D: How To Reignite Desire claims via its packaging that it’s a “no-holds-barred exploration of the pleasures of love-making.” Did I mention you get 3D glasses too? Oh God… So, safely stashed away between my Sex and the City DVD’s and the man’s Jason Bourne box-set, I decided to leave the DVD for when I was feeling, well, amorous. But, it did get me thinking… do we really need to be taught how to have sex? Admittedly, we’ve all swapped sex advice with girlfriends in the pub... and we’ve all watched a sneaky bit of porn for tips. But how often have you left the pub, after hearing your best bud describe a body-twisting sex move that sounds like something out of a contortionist act, and started to wonder if your sex life was as good as hers? Are you as good in bed as all the other women in the world? Are you (do you dare think it) as good as his ex? Suddenly this unrealistic portrayal of sex and how it's done, means people end up questioning the normality of their bedroom antics. I'd hate to presume what goes on behind closed doors, but I would guess, for most of us, our sex lives do not entirely resemble what you might stumble across on So, could a sex guide (one that actually shows you - minus the porn stars - how to be better in bed) actually be something worth investing in? Is a sex refresher course something we should all sign up for? When I brought this up with friends in a bar last week, they all looked at me horrified. “A how to have sex DVD? Are you joking?” they squealed.
But, that evening when we had all parted ways, I had three separate texts asking if I could lend them 'the DVD the PR sent me'. Which got me thinking – why shouldn’t we want to be better at sex? We spend money and time investing in our careers, our wardrobes and going out with friends, so why shouldn’t we invest in our sex lives too? Who wouldn’t want to know all of the positions of the Karma Sutra? Who would actually say, “no thanks, I’d rather not know how to have multiple orgasms, thank you very much”? So my advice to you? Sex refresher courses (books, DVDs, Cosmo sex advice) are the way forward! After all, what man isn’t going to love the phrase "I’ve got to work tonight, darling" when he knows it’s related to sex? He’ll be offering to help you with homework before you know it!