Prepare yourself for the cringe to end all cringes.
This story of toe-curling sex horror comes from (where else?) Reddit. Specifically, the 'Today, I Fucked Up' subreddit.
User Muricannn_way shares her story of in-car sexy-time gone so, SO wrong. In case you hadn't already guessed, this is NSFW:
"TIFU by living out one of my boyfriends fantasies. My boyfriend has always wanted me to give him head while he's driving. I've been pretty reluctant to give it a go for a couple of reasons; like if we went over a bump and I accidentally bit his member, or if he crashes because he closes his eyes or something. But nothing could have prepared me for what happened when I eventually gave it a shot.
I had been away abroad to due to work for a couple of weeks and my boyfriend collected me at the airport upon my arrival. We were naturally delighted to see each other, we kissed, we hugged, we drove to town, walked around, had lunch and eventually at around 5pm, we began our 3 hour journey back home.
We are a pretty sexually active couple, will do it two to three times a day given the option, so a couple of weeks apart was tough and left us both pretty horny. We had been sexting a lot and he was telling me what got him going and what he wanted me to do to him when I got home. One of them was to give him head while he drives.
Anyway, we get on the road and settled in for the car ride. We listened to music, talked about my trip and what he got up to while I was away etc etc. We eventually got quiet and really really horny. I thought we could wait, but when we had about half an hour left in the journey, my boyfriend placed his hand on my thigh and traced it up and started fingering me. I looked over at him and I could see clearly that he was hard. It turned me on more. Anyway, long story short, one thing led to another and I decided to give him a blowjob. It was fucking great, he loved getting it, I loved giving it. It was hot.
At the beginning, I told him to keep an eye out for cars passing and to tell me so I could stop in time. But as we got more and more into it I didn't care anymore, in fact it was turning me on more that other people may know what's going on. Plus, at this stage into the journey the roads were getting quieter (I live in a pretty quiet, small town, so there weren't many people taking the same route as us that day).
This is when it all went downhill.
I would like to stay anonymous, without giving too much away, I will just add that the airport I had arrived in that day is in a city that my father works in three days a week. I had forgotten this fact and that he comes home on Thursday evenings. The thought hadn't even occurred to me to ask him for a lift home as my boyfriend had my return planned since he heard about the trip. I never thought what happened was even remotely possible.
My boyfriend starts slowing down, we're about to turn into the start of my hometown road. I was determined to make him cum before we got near my neighbourhood. So I bob my head up and down fast. Just as he starts coming, I hear someone calling his name. A car has pulled up beside him. My boyfriend literally cums at the same time the voice calls him and he lets out a loud grunt. I can hear the voice saying "what the fuck" and realise I recognise that voice. I panic and jump up, hit my head off the steering wheel, bite my tongue and in the process my bf's cum spits out my mouth, goes all over my chin and top and pieces of the car. I look up and see my father staring back at me through the open windows. He just looks from me to my boyfriend, aghast, turns to face the road ahead and keeps driving.
We turned around and drove to my boyfriend’s apartment instead of going to my home to give my parents a surprise visit. Something tells me, Dad had gotten a surprise big enough for the whole family.
TLDR; my Dad saw me finish off my boyfriend by giving him head in his car and spilling his cum all over myself."
What happened next? Did her dad ever mention what happened? Was her boyfriend still invited over for Sunday roast?
Well, when asked if her dad ever said anything about the incident, Muricannn_way had this to say:
"Nope! Literally nothing. Met him the next day, my mom asked us for dinner. It was so unbelievably awkward. Think my boyfriend almost shat himself. I also have a feeling, although nothing has been said, that my mother knows too, Dad and her tell each other everything - they're like old women when it comes to gossip. I'm in my mid-twenties, so there's not much he could say to me anyway I don't think. We kind of moved on and have forgotten about it, but every now and again when my Dad is around, I remember and cringe."
We. Can't. Even.