Sex

Sabrina De Palma: If only Cinderella had casual sex

How come guys can have casual sex with no repercussions, while us girls only get labelled?

So it seems I ruffled some feathers with my last post regarding certain extracurricular activities whilst on ‘Holiday Mode’. It sparked an interesting debate amongst my readers discussing casual sex and whether a female acting on their needs should ‘justify their promiscuity’ or join most of the male population and be comfortable with it.

Just for the record I have rarely (can't say never) had casual sex with a 'random' as one reader put it, but I am not against it either. Everyone is free to make their own choices and those choices shouldn't be judged by anyone because they have different values - but that's just my opinion. Don't get me started on the equalities of men and women and casual sex because we all know it's non-existent. Despite how often this issue is debated, females engaging in casual sex will always be looked upon as promiscuous or slutty whilst men earn a more glamorous title. You may not agree with it but that's the way it is. Whether or not you choose to care about those labels is another matter. The fact is, we all need sex for one reason or another. Whether we're craving some affection, wanting to feel desired or just plain horny - sometimes a scratch just needs to be itched and when you're being pinned against the wall by 'what's his name' labels don't come into play. Look, we're all looking for love in some way. Most of us (and by us, I mean females) want to be in a monogamous relationship but it's not as easy to find for some as it is for others, so in the meantime shouldn't you (ie me) be allowed to have some fun? Throughout my dating life, I have often followed the rulebook - you know, the one that guarantees you will live happily ever after? I've rarely been with a man outside of a relationship, I have played the 'good girl' that doesn't sleep around but guess what? I am still single, 30 and searching for my prince. There's no right way around it. I have avoided casual sex in the past because I, like many other girls, find it hard to be intimate with someone without feelings involved. But if anyone is like me, those feelings don't come around too often so borrowing a guy's rulebook now and then is a must. From an early age we are lead to believe that finding love is so easy, you just meet someone, fall in love, get married, make babies and The End. But how the story should read is - You meet someone, fall in love, dump someone, have casual sex. You meet someone, fall in love, get heartbroken, have casual sex. You meet someone, fall in love, get married and cross your fingers. THEN a casual fling or two wouldn't be so frowned upon!