Stay in the love bubble

How do you stop the passion popping? Cosmo’s sexpert has the answers…

Ah, new love. It’s like The Little Mermaid movie come to life. It’s all singing, it’s all dancing, it’s always better down where it’s wetter. But as good as it is, it can also fade faster than cut flowers in 40-degree heat.

You see, there’s this natty thing called limerence. It’s that deliciously tantalising feeling you get in the wee, first stages of relationship, and it’s what’s responsible for creating said love bubble. In psychological terms, it’s an involuntary state of mind that comes from having romantic feelings for someone combined with the desire to have them feel the same way about you. Basically, it’s what you might call having a crush.

Physically, you can’t get enough. Butterflies hold drag races in your tummy, and the very thought of him drives you to distraction. You’re also probably having what is arguably the best sex of your whole doggone relationship – every touch, every word and every time is etched into your grey matter. You relive every moment at work, in the shower, at the bus stop… It’s flippin’ glorious. But over time, what was once chocolate fudge with sprinkles slowly morphs into vanilla – nay, vanilla that’s been lying out in the sun and now has ants in its grill. And no one wants that in their bedroom. So how do you keep the love bubble afloat?

Firstly, you need to make a pre-emptive strike. Start by writing down all the things about him and what he does to you that make you smile. Go on, make a list. Quick, while you’re still limerent!

How’d you go? Did you think of something? Great, keep going. Months down the track when you’re seething because he forgot to pick up dirty socks again, pull it out and have a read. If it doesn’t make you want to mount him on the kitchen table right then and there, you should probably just become pen pals.

Next up: exercise. Think of this as the Ice Magic on your ice-cream of good times. Because getting sweaty outside of the bedroom always leads to getting sweaty within it. In fact, research shows that a short burst of aerobic activity – like 20 minutes on the treadmill – bolsters sexual arousal immediately*. And, of course, the better and fitter you feel, the more nookie you’ll want to have.

And for rapture’s sake, a little sexy textie goes a long way. Not only does it make your day at work/uni/the abattoir infinitely more bearable, it’ll help keep that love bubble of yours buoyant. Apply liberally twice a week, forever. Stay bubbly, people.