Sex

Tara Tries...

Our guinea pig tries out erotic hypnotherapy… we didn’t know it existed either!

Imagine closing your eyes, entering a trance-like state and then by visualising pleasure achieving NEVER-ENDING ORGASMS. Sounds like a dream come true, right? Well Dr Herby (aka the Happy Hypnotist) claims he can make this fantasy a reality. Yes, Dr H can allegedly induce multiple orgasms (for his patients) using an experimental form of erotic hypnotherapy.

"So there isn't any contact, or nudity? I just sit here with my eyes closed and have a continuous orgasm?" I ask, wondering if Dr Herby can tell I'm feeling a little skeptical about the whole thing.

"Yes, that's correct," he answers grinning his Mad Hatter smile that I find most unsettling.

"I will guide you into a meditative state and then using powerful, imaginative involvement, I will intensify your body's feeling of pleasure until you combust into a euphoric loop of orgasmic bliss."

I stare at him, my mouth hanging open. I'm confused. He is going to do what?

I decide it's probably bestnotto ask too many questions and to just go with it so I settle back into his over-sized armchair. I raise my hand above my head and follow his instructions. I begin to breathe in and out and try to force my body to relax.

"With each breath outtttttt you become more and more relaxxxxed," Dr H purrs.

"I'm trying, but I ..."

"Shhhhh. Let it flow over you ... feel my voice sink beneath your skin. Let it tickle and dribble into your soul."

I giggle. Is this guy kidding?

After 15 minutes of hyperventilation, I do actually begin to relax a little, and without even realising, my hand lowers itself into my lap ... the telling sign that I have entered Trance Land.

Although I feel quite dozy and a little floaty, I can hear Dr H loud and clear and I do my best to follow his commands. I begin to visualise a growing light radiating from my vagina. In my mind's eye, I turn the light into shades of red, green and lastly, bright orange.

"Feel the centre of your fairy egg expand within you, feel the warmth of your egg pulsating in and around your lady loins." Dr H believes all females have a 'fairy egg' within them and that society teaches us to compress the egg rather than encouraging it to inflate and grow inside of us.

I wasn't too sure I wanted any type of egg growing inside of me but I keep quiet and try my best to turn myself in a chicken. I am definitely producing some sort of heat down below, and for a moment I actually think it may be working.

But it gets harder to keep up with his increasing tempo.

"Grow your genitals.....now shrink them like a pine nut, nowwww expand them like an elephant. GO. GO. GO. Sooooo warm, so wonderful, so hot...Go there, go there!"

I feel Dr H jump up from his chair and begin to circle me. It sounds as if he is jumping and waving and then all of a sudden a gust of breath hits me.

"INTENSIFY," he bellows right into my face. "INTENSIFY, now, INTENSIFY, do it now, explode."

I didn't know what to do. I was desperately clinging onto my composure, trying not to laugh uncontrollably while at the same time feeling so overwhelmed with the pressure to perform, to feel something, to have a euphoric release. I couldn't take it any longer.

So I do the only thing I can think of.

"OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!"

I faked it.