Sex

The blended orgasm

They did it with smoothies … now they’re doing it with orgasms!

Blended orgasm

If the thought of putting your genitals anywhere near a blender is making you do involuntary Kegels, I don't blame you. But don't worry - you'll be pleased to hear there's no machinery involved.

The blended orgasm gets its name from combining a C-spot and a G-spot orgasm into one giant Holy Grail of a climax. Now I'm sure this isn't an entirely new discovery - there were no doubt Elizabethan-age women getting their kicks thusly - but by giving it a name, writing articles about it, and generally getting the word out there, more of us can hopefully get on the blended bandwagon.

Statistically speaking, you will probably have already experienced a clitoral (C-spot) orgasm, and hopefully many of you also know the awesome power of a Gräfenberg (G-spot) orgasm, not to mention how different they are. So, with that in mind, let's skip ahead and discover how to combine the two.

Lone Star

Before you go demanding one from your unsuspecting partner, try it out yourself first. It's like cooking a new recipe - you'd taste the sauce before slathering it on your boyfriend's steak, right? You'll need two hands … or a hand and a vibrator … or, if you're very dexterous, you might be able to use one hand while texting with the other.

Here's what you have to do: get cosy and stimulate your clitoris however you see fit. Then, right before you hit XXX-town, move your administrations to your G-spot. Not sure where it is? There's no other way to put this: you have to insert a finger and feel around. It should be on the front wall of your vagina and feel rough, like the roof of your mouth. You'll know when you hit it - mostly 'cos it's amazing, but also because it might make you want to pee (this will pass). The same deal goes, but this time, when you're almost there, let your other hand (or vibrator) walk back to your C-spot. Boom - you're there!

Two Star

Once you've mastered the Lone Star (it might take practice), play tutor to your bedroom buddy. Start off by propping yourself up with pillows so your hips are elevated (muy, muy important). Then, after a little foreplay, he may enter. This works best if you have your lower legs hanging off the end of the bed with him standing over you. He should hit the spot instantly, but if not, tilt your pelvis higher to meet him. When things are cookin', stop. And then start up with the C-spot attention - either of you can partake. Alternate both moves until you're a piece of gum ready to burst, then rock them in tandem for the big finale. You're now a Two-Star Lay!

Rock Star

By now, you're all, "Oh yeah, blended… We do that all the time. Yawn." Which means it's time to make like Curtis Stone and add a little extra spice. There are ways to bring the blend to almost any position you choose. What's that? Your man likes doggie-style? While you're on all fours, you're in Mother Nature's version of the pillow tilt - everything's already lined up for his erection to hit your G-spot, so get him to reach round and stimulate your clitoris, too.

If you're more of a woman-on-top type, try reversing it and straddle him backwards (this is to get the right angle going on), then caress your own C-spot while riding him.

And fear not for your man-friend - he'll reap rewards, too. Because the blended orgasm means lighting a fire under two distinctly different areas of your anatomy, the extra effort slows the whole thing down and helps him last longer. Not to mention that feeling and watching you have the climax of your life will send him bonkers.

Gosh, we learnt a lot in this story! Does anyone else need a nap?