You're in the bedroom with a dreamboat, things are getting hot and heavy and you feel like a sex goddess...before, uh oh, his member is about as hard as jelly. But whhhhyyyyyy??? He secretly thinks you're fugly, he's actually gay, your breath stinks?! Hold up there Queen Worst Case Scenario, before you panic you should know that there are some strange, non-you-related things that could be ruining your sexy times. AND, you’re not the first woman to experience this, according to impotenceaustralia.com.au anywhere from 13 to 50 percent of men between the ages of 40 and 70 have problems with occasional erectile dysfunction (ED).
So, what’s going on with him?
He watches too much porn
Yep, if he is having a good time with himself too often it will mean he is too sapped to get it going for the real deal. “Excessive masturbation taxes a man’s libido and makes it so he doesn’t have a lot of mojo left for you,” says Ian Kerner, author of She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman. Unless he’s skipping work to get his fix, it’s not something that requires therapy, but it does warrant discussion. “Let him know that you can feel the power of his erection when he hasn’t ejaculated in a day or two,” says Kerner. “That should give him the hint.”
He doesn’t get enough sleep
Apparently snoring will keep you up at night, but will keep his penis completely down. According to researchers at Technion-Israel Institute of Technology in Haifa, half of men who snored, or more specifically suffered sleep apnea, also released seriously low level of testosterone during the night. And we all know what isn’t going to happen when his testosterone level are low!
He just doesn’t feel like it right now
Despite popular belief, all men aren’t sex-craved monsters that are up for it at every second of the day. That’s right; he might just be in a completely unsexy mood: “Many people still assume guys are sex obsessed; that all a man needs to get an erection is for the wind to blow,” says Dr Abraham Morgentaler, an associate clinical professor of urology at Harvard Medical School. “It’s simply not the case.”
And that’s fine, it’s not you, it’s not a massive problem in your relationship, it’s just a matter of finding a better time (aka not the second he has walked in the door after work or if he’s running late to his mate’s birthday lunch).
He doesn’t get it up often enough
Newsflash: underuse can be a much of an erection-blocker as overuse. You know how doing squats at the gym makes your legs stronger and as a result you’re able to do lots of things with your toned pins that you usually wouldn’t be able to? Yeah, well it’s the same with a guy’s penis: an erection is like a workout for his member – they’re essential for maximum use and need to happen on the reg.
"It has to be essentially exercised," says Tobias Kohler, assistant professor of urology at Southern Illinois University School of Medicine. "If they don't do anything to maintain normal erections, they will get shortening of the penis.” Yikes, take note guys. Apparently having sex once a week can halve men's chances of developing erection problems.
He doesn’t clean his teeth properly
Say whut? Seriously, guys who don’t have a good relationship with their toothbrush could be inadvertently ruining your horizontal mambo. Research published in the Journal of Periodontology claims erectile problems are seven times more likely to happen to a man with gum disease than a guy who flosses like a good boy. Apparently all the stuff caught in your BF’s dirty teeth eventually messes with his blood vessels and can cause inflammation that will keep him soft. We’ve never heard a better reason to get flossing!
He doesn’t moisturise
This is another one we really didn’t expect…men with eczema have a 60 percent higher rate of ED. Talk about a double whammy. An article in the Journal of Sexual Medicine again found that inflammation is the cause of the problem, so flakes could equal flop.