It’s true: Blac Chyna and Rob Kardashian have procreated. And this adds a rather confusing layer to the ALREADY confusing family tree that is the Kardashian/Jenner clan.
So what is the best thing to do in situations like this? Why, we create a ye olde guide to the family that you just kan’t keep up with, no matter how many Snapchats you replay. What fun!
Let’s start from the end…
Blac Chyna and Rob Kardashian
So, Blac Chyna (real name: Angela White) entered the scene back in 2014 as “Kim’s friend” on an episode of Keeping up with the Kardashians. They even went pole dancing together. AND shared a #bumfie. THAT’S how tight this crew was.
At the time, she was with her babydaddy, Tyga (real name: Michael Stevenson) who she'd been with since 2011.
But sometimes the great loves don't last and she's now engaged to Rob: the one male Kardashian.
Which brings us to…
Tyga and Kylie Jenner
Tyga and Blac Chyna split up in 2014 and, not long after, rumours began swirling like a Disney film whirlpool that Tygs and Ky were hooking up. Of course things remained hush hush, because Kylie was 17 and Tyga was 25...
Then the worst kept secret was revealed on Kylie’s 18th birthday (she’s legal ya’ll!) when Tyga proved being a c-grade rapper can really reap the big bucks and bought his bae a Ferrari.
Chyna was not impressed.
HONOURABLE MENTION: King Cairo
This cherub of a human being is Tyga and Blac Chyna’s son. And that is his real name. Kylie Jenner is his sort-of step mum and Rob Kardashian is his sort-of step dad. Making Kylie his also sort-of auntie and Rob his also sort-of uncle.
This is why we can’t have nice things, people.
The spawn of Blac Chyna and Rob
So in light of the news they’re expecting, we should nut out this baby’s family. So, with Blac Chyna and Rob its parents, Kylie is its aunt and her boyfriend its mother’s ex-partner and father of its half-brother, but also a sort-of uncle through (non-existent) marriage. The thing that sets this little tot apart from the rest is that is it the only one who will carry the Kardsahian name. We’ve got Wests and Disicks, but no Kardashian kids for the next generation.
Side note: Blac Chyna says she will change her name to Angela Kardashian.
G dang hilarious Instagram account, Betches, illustrates it perfectly:
Blac Chyna is famously best friends with Amber Rose, who used to date Kanye West, who is married to Kim Kardashian and the father of North and Saint West, the cousin of ‘in utero Kardashian’. Amber totes dissed the fam way bad when Tyga left Blac reportedly for Kylie, which culminated in a Twitter war between Khloe and Amber. Khloe now being future-sister-in-law to Ambers BFF and aunt to spawn.
So far, everything is wrapped up in a neat little package! Really, I mean that. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic.
And then there’s Kendall and Kris. The end.
We think the correct term for this may be a clusterfuck but boy oh boy, are we looking forward to watching it on KUWTK...