Bachelor

Is it just me or is 'The Bachelor Australia 2018' becoming dull?

Blistex and boredom.

By Susannah Guthrie

Here at Cosmo, we love The Bachelor. We thrive on it. It's our bread and butter.

But, for some reason, I'm feeling this season is dragging on ever so slightly and I can't quite put my finger on why.

I don't want to say it's because the Tripod left, but maybe it's because the Tripod left?!? Look, bullying is never OK, but perhaps Cat, Alisha and Romy created so much drama that their absence has left a void no one else is quite capable of filling?

Then there's the fact that all the girls are great and I'm rooting for all of them. Seriously, I don't hate any of them. They're all bonza sheilas. The Honey Badger would be lucky to end up with any of them.

I'm also tired of the episode formula which goes a little something like this:

1. The single date card arrives and one girl gets amped up while everyone screams

2. Nick Cummins collects the single date winner in some weird form of transport

3. Someone uses Blistex

4. A young woman is forced to do extreme sports against her better judgement

5. Someone in production goes HAM with the tealights and they have a drink near a body of water

It's just getting kind of stale. Not to mention the hectic group dates, which always involve some kind of metaphorical challenge about women being better mothers, or having control issues, or "proving their commitment" and "opening their heart" to a man who can't even text them back 'cos his phone has been confiscated.

This latest one actually saw them carrying a physical representation of their emotional baggage across a river, FFS.

Quick shout-out to Jamie-Lee who was invited for a day of physical activity despite having a torn ligament and then made to sit in the bush while everyone else had fun before being sent home.

The whole thing gave me strong Meredith from The Parent Trap vibes.

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Look, maybe it was just a weird episode. I don't want to be too negative, but I need something MORE.

Like Romy triumphantly returning having dealt with her antagonistic behaviour in an ashram and stealing the Honey Badger's heart, prompting the other women to form a non-violent militia intent on bringing her down.

Or something like that, I dunno.