Beauty

10 things guys want to know about your beauty routine

Do you even bother putting on makeup when it's raining?

There's a lot that can be said about the ritualism of "getting ready." We do so much to look good, whether for ourselves or for others. And I don't even think that in 2016, I can really pull the "OMG, women take so much longer to get ready" card; plenty of guys blow-dry, use gel and lotions and salves, and manscape, etc. But the way men and women get dress is still so different, so we've got a lot of questions.

1. Why is there so much makeup? I feel like there should be foundation and then, like, one other thing. Like a multipurpose liner you just rub on wherever. So you've got your basecoat, and then your lipstick and eyeliner all matches, and you're done.

2. Can't you just get in and out, pit crew-style? If I wore makeup, I would take pride in knowing I could apply it in under a minute and sprint out the door and still get to work. If you've been putting on makeup for 10 years, I feel like it should take less than 20 minutes.

3. How is it even possible to have 12 different products just for your face? I could sit alone in a room for days and still not come up with that many things to do to my face. I'm also an idiot who isn't in charge of beauty products, and those two things are probably correlated. Also, what are sheet masks?

4. Isn't it easier to just leave the makeup on forever? I know, I know, it's bad for your skin ... but so is waking up an extra hour early for work every day just to do all this stuff.

5. Do you even bother putting on makeup when it's raining? Personally, I'd look for any excuse not to. Slight chance of rain? Screw it. High winds? Screw it. High humidity? Screw it.

6. How much time is spent actually putting on makeup, and how much time is spent just fucking with people? Do you ever just leave a guy at the bar or waiting for you downstairs just to see how he reacts? Is this some kind of mental game? Sometimes it really feels like that.

7. Do you ever realise you skipped a step and then have to start over? At that point I would just call out and go back to sleep, honestly.

8. Does it ever hurt? Some of the things that come dangerously close to your eyeballs look like medieval torture devices.

9. Why do you never actually wear the first outfit you try on? I hate to make a generalisation, but I know in my heart there's truth to this. Just put the other outfit on first. It'll save you a tonne of time.

10. Do you get pissed when people are like, "You look so much better without makeup?" I realise they're trying to pay you a compliment about your natural beauty, which is nice. But what even is natural beauty? Plus, doesn't that piss you off, after spending the aforementioned 20 minutes putting all that stuff on?

Source: Cosmo US