Caitlin Stasey – actress, feminist and equal rights campaigner – has always been vocal about making sure everyone has the same rights. She has not only used her fluid sexuality as an example, but has also created platforms where other people to feel safe, protected and normal.
To celebrate Cosmo’s Pride Issue, starring Ruby Rose on the cover and on sale now, we asked Caitlin to share her thoughts on same-sex marriage, and why it should be an option for EVERYONE.
Read her powerful words here:
You don't need to hear this from me, a queer, poly woman protected and secure within hetero wedlock. In fact, you might not need to hear it all. By now we've traversed this landscape one million times, one million different ways, sung by a beautiful, diverse chorus of one million different, somewhat harmonious voices.
If you are STILL of the opinion that gay people shouldn't be able to get married (to each other) I doubt there will be much that will move you to abandoning this (preposterous, dumb, stupid) belief.
You will however be the kind of person for which future generations apologise. You will be the great aunt/uncle/grandmother/grandfather of some kid, someday, who will be mortified by you and your strident commitment to this absurd stance.
I'm also confident the concept of your progeny’s future shame doesn't move you either; if anything, it’ll probably incentivise you further. If you LOVE the traditional institution of marriage – women as property, fathers as Grand Unquestioned Overlords – you will probably cling, white-knuckled, to your dull, hateful rhetoric.So I'll choose instead to address the LGBTQIA amongst this readership.
Hi. You deserve better. I'm mortified, deeply disturbed and incredulous that this simple, SIMPLE amendment has not been implemented in our country. You are people. You are human beings. You are adults. You can vote. You can die for this country. You can go to war. You count. And this abuse by omission is hateful, puritanical, and DUMB; perhaps more insulting still, the majority of your countrymen are on your side. Most of us want everyone to be able to marry. Or are happily indifferent enough not to oppose it.
Look, marriage isn't for everyone; fewer and fewer people regard marriage as the inevitable milestone it once was (a foundational, social cornerstone symbolising theoretical decency and actual tax incentives). To assume that the end goal for all relationships is marriage is reductive.
Marriage is a living and breathing concept that has come to reflect those who participate in it. Not everyone chooses it. But everyone should be able to. Christ, I have. Should I be so lucky? And not my fellows? I want everyone to have all the marriages they can stomach. It would be selfish not to.
I'm not saying you all have to get married. Obviously, not all same-sex couples aspire to marriage. However, all people, of any demographic, should BE ABLE to become a part of any federally bestowed institution. Because they are people and that is how civil rights work. Especially if our country is to pride itself on all the usual democratic thingies like "equality" and "freedom." Sorry, that’s how it works.
We cannot have a separate list of rights, to sometimes be applied, and more for the people we like, and still be equal. Because fucking obviously. Is logic so appallingly difficult to acquire? So even those of you who never want to settle down, who want to be about dat life (and I support that), you still deserve to make marriage YOUR choice.
And you – you future, horrible grandparents – you need to get over your shitty little puerile homophobia and let men put rings on each other if they want. Or women. Of every sort and variety. It’s goddamn time. My god, Ireland did it. Ireland.
So whether marriage is a vehicle for citizenship, shared health plans, management of shared assets, love, or all of the above, it is a right that is owed to everyone who should choose it.
Rise up, my people! Demand our pathetic cadre of blowhard politicians listen for once! They are beholden to us! Those dickheads! Do not let up! Demand they acknowledge your humanity! Vote them out if they don't! Hold them accountable at the polls! It’s honestly the only way – that and economic boycotts. Weaponise your dollars. Hit 'em where it hurts. The bastards. Anyway, think it over.
I mean, frankly, it's so embarrassing, so, so embarrassing that we, as a nation, have denied you this privilege, which brings with it absolutely no cost to anyone, aside from the financial cost on the part of the wedding-havers. Which would be you. Oh, and that money would go where, the bigots ask? OH BACK INTO THE ECONOMY YOU SAY? DESTINATION WEDDINGS FOR GAY COUPLES YOU SAY? MILLIONS IN REVENUE FROM THE WEDDING INDUSTRY ANNUALLY YOU SAY?
My god, the horrors...
In the meantime, let's all get back to celebrating the sanctity of marriage by watching the billionth season of the fucking Bachelor.
Caitlin made The Rainbow List, Cosmo's round-up of 50 incredible Aussies fighting for equal rights and generally making life better for the LGBTQI community. See the full list in the March issue, on sale now.