Celebrity

Caitlyn Jenner reveals she was suicidal during her transition

“You got a gun. Let’s just end it right here.”

By Erin Van Der Meer
Caitlyn Jenner reveals she was suicidal during her transition

Caitlyn Jenner has revealed how close she came to committing suicide during her gender transition in a shocking new interview.

Caitlyn told Any Given Wednesday host Bill Simmons how she contemplated taking her own life after she was photographed leaving a doctor’s surgery following an operation to have her Adam’s Apple removed.

“I could not sleep that night. I’m up at 3AM walking up and down my hallway, thinking, Damn, all this sh*t is going to come out tomorrow and it’s going to be horrible,” she remembered.

“And I said, ‘You know what? Easy way. Go in the other room. You got a gun. Let’s just end it right here.’”

“That’s, like, the easy way out. No more pain, no more nothing. I don’t have to deal with the tabloids any longer,” she said. “I don’t have to deal with any of this. And that was probably the lowest I’ve ever gotten.”

For the Olympic gold medal winner, it was the idea of that being the end of her story that stopped her from committing suicide.

“Wasn’t that, like, the stupidest thing you’ve ever done? I thought, What a terrible way to end your life’s story! I don’t want my story to end that way, on a negative note,” she shared.

“That was the beginning of me turning my thinking around to say, ‘OK, I think I can do this.’”

Caitlyn teared up as she told Simmons how much happier she is after ‘coming out’, saying she now feels she can “live authentically”.

“Going through this, I have renewed my excitement for life. My life today is so interesting, so simple. It really is so simple.”