‘Crotch Charms’ now exist and we are worried for the world

Because, vagina bling is now a thing?

crotch charms vagina bling

Have you ever walked down the beach in your bikini and thought, ‘you know what this look is missing? Gems dangling down from my vagina.’ Nope, us neither.

But one company thinks that this is exactly what the world needs: Crotch charms.

Japanese ‘jewellery’ company BoDivas is ~pioneering~ the trend with its intimate beach bling range.

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The product is essentially a metal chain with dangling stone charms that you hook on the inside of your bikini bottoms, so the charms hang down and swing from side-to-side (we guess), slapping your thighs with every step.

These crotch charms are available in an array of colours and cost around $20 each — just in case you want to splash out on the whole ‘beachtail’ range.

This dodgy piece of jewellery seems to be joining the growing collection of things being made that should NEVER be near your vagina. We’re looking at you, vaginal glitter capsules

The potential problems with this new ~invention~? Well, firstly, it could get ripped out. We all had the ‘no earrings during sports’ chat from our PE teacher, so we can be sure that putting a hook near your vagina is NOT a well-thought-out plan. Secondly, if you are wearing this on the beach (as the company suggests), that metal is going to get seriously hot and could scorch your vag!

We highly recommend avoiding this questionable piece of jewellery at all costs. Stick to your usual beach get-up and celebrate your vagina in a natural, less potential-scalding, kind of way.