There are plenty of signs out there that indicate he’s totally into you. You know the ones; that look in his eyes when he’s talking to you, the way he responds to your texts in three seconds flat, and the way he didn’t even seem to want to check out that hot brunette chick that strutted past you both. On the flipside, seeing the signs that indicate he’s not into you can be a little harder, which is why we’re here to help…
Sign one: he never initiates seeing you
While some guys can just be super disorganised, using this as an excuse as to why he can’t arrange a date with you ain’t going to cut it. Plus, it most likely means he’s not prepared to make an effort to be with you. “Relationships are a two-way street, you both need to make an effort if it's going to work. You don't want to be playing games your whole relationship, it's much better to be with someone who is really into you and makes an effort,” explains Isiah McKimmie.
Sign two: he doesn’t want to talk about “relationships”
You’ve met his friends; he’s met yours. You spend every spare minute you have together and the only milestone you need to tick off is meeting his ‘rents. But there’s one catch: he hasn’t actually brought up the “are we in a relationship?” convo yet and avoids it at all costs. “Sometimes it's just too early to tell where a relationship is going, but if you've been spending time together and you're developing feelings, it's fair that you want to know where things are at.” He could be keeping his options open so watch out for this guy.
If you want to bring up the relationship convo, keep it super casual. “Guys don't handle pressure or ‘serious talks' very well. Best thing is just to let him know how you're feeling and what you want, and then to ask where things are at for him,” says Isiah. If he doesn’t want the same thing, move on and be glad you didn't waste anymore time with him.
Sign three: he loves you… when he’s drunk
He’s affectionate, attentive and super sweet. Only problem is, he’s only like this when he’s ten beers deep. As much as you might love his attention – don’t give in to him if he’s only going to act like your dream guy when he’s plastered. “Never let yourself be someone's booty call - you deserve way better than that! I hate to say it, but if he only calls when he's drunk it's probably because he didn't pick up someone else while he was out,” explains Isiah.
Sign four: he always acts like you’re not together
You’re basically in a relationship but he always has to ruin the moment by adding a disclaimer like “yeah, but I’m pretty happy being single”. So what does this kind of behaviour mean? “It depends how early it is in the relationship, but if you've clearly been dating and sleeping together for a few weeks, it's time to have that 'casual conversation' about how you feel and what you want,” urges Isiah. And if he doesn’t want the same thing? Invest your time finding someone who does.
Sign four: he’s not respectful
If you’ve always dated kinda sh**y guys, it can be super hard to know how you should and shouldn’t* be treated. But if the guy you’re with doesn’t make you feel good, that's a huge sign he's not for you. “If he's into you, he will make an effort. It should never be up to one person to always initiate contact. You should always expect him to compliment you and make you feel good,” says Isiah. Because you’re totally worth it.
Photography credit: Nick Scott/Bauersyndication.com.au