10 things nobody tells you about having sex when you're pregnant

A group of mothers get VERY candid about doing the deed when you're up the duff

By Louise Baty

1. No, a penis will not touch the baby. 'My man freaked himself out as he thought he could feel the baby's head with his manhood. I have no idea how big or sensitive he thinks it is. I pointed out it was probably my cervix but he doesn't believe me.'

2. Your vagina can SNEEZE. 'My vagina started to sneeze when I came. It deposited a large mucus plug all over my partner. Grim.'

3. You may find that your favourite positions are nigh on impossible. 'My husband and I decided we missed the intimacy of missionary. We tried it, and he ended up on top of my bump like a beached whale. Not going to be trying that again.'

4. Orgasms might not just leave you with a fuzzy feeling. 'Sex in the latter stages brought on the most painful Braxton Hicks that lasted three days and ended with me in hospital being examined to make sure I wasn't in early labour!'

5. Your bladder control won't be what it was. 'I weed in his face when I climaxed after oral. I didn't squirt: I did an actual wee. Poor man, but it was totally out of my control and I couldn't help it.'

6. You may find yourself masturbating more. 'I definitely felt more aroused in my second trimester, and found that if I didn't get sex every day, I had to sort myself out.'

7. Your dreams may get a lot more entertaining. 'My pregnancy dreams were HOT - I orgasmed in my sleep a lot.'

8. Sex will get noisier. 'At 35 weeks pregnant, doing it doggy style introduced a lot of air…then fanny farts, hilarity and giggling.'

9. Be prepared for unwelcome distractions. 'There's something very off putting when you're reaching orgasm and suddenly your unborn takes offence and starts kicking.'

10. Expect the unexpected. 'It's not unusual to find your nipples leaking milk mid-sex.'

Louise Baty is the author of 'The Dos and Don'ts of Pregnancy'.

Source: Cosmo UK