When bad sex happens to good people

Sometimes, no matter how hard he is trying, the guy you’re with just can’t hit the spot. The problem could be the things he thinks you want are wrong…

So you’re hot for each other and you want nothing more than to rip his clothes off … then it all goes wrong. He slobbers too much in your ear, makes out with your feet and jackhammers like his life depends on it. Gross, huh? But before you blame him and label him a dud in bed you should know that there are some things guys mistakenly think that ladies luuurrvvveee during sex. Want to know what they are?

These are the things guys think women want (but they really don’t)…

You’re into pace

For some reason many guys think: the faster the better. Wrong! Everyone loves some quick action from time-to-time, but you don’t always want to be sleeping with a jackhammer. This is an easy fix though, get on top so you can control the speed and show him exactly how you like it, or grab his butt and whisper into his ear how much it turns you on when he goes slow and deep.

You want oads of boob action

Obviously most women love their breast getting attention during foreplay and when done correctly, good boob stimulation can be key to an orgasm. But, please take note guys, this does not mean hard squeezing, too much flick of the nipple or twisting. Our chests are super sensitive, bruise easily and ache when we’re menstruating so they need to be treated like they have a huge “fragile” sticker on them. Again the best way to right this wrong is to show by doing: either play with his nipples the way you wish he’d play with yours (while whispering, “I’d love you to do this to me too”), or grab his hands and guide them around your boobs in a gentle way.

You need to come. Every. Single. Time.

Guys tend to assume that if we don’t come, they have failed. And while we are stoked to have the big O as often as possible, a lack of climax from us doesn’t mean the whole sex session was a waste of time. Not only does this kind of mind frame put pressure on both of you, it means that he can get obsessed and spend too much time down there, even if there is just no way it’s going to happen tonight. Show, and tell, him that you’re having a great time in the moment and that the end goal doesn’t always have to be you coming four times.

You love the big thrust

When guys can see we are getting close to an orgasm, some of them think that one huge, hard thrust will be all it takes to push us into dreamland. Not always the case, dudes. If fact, this often just kind of hurts, can contribute to UTIs and can also twist the vaginal cord in weird ways. With this one it’s best just to be honest with your BF, tell him that you like it better when he just keeps going as he was and leaves the big thrusting for the gym, not the bedroom.

You need him to have  a giant penis

Guys watch porn. Fact. Lots of male porn stars have huge penises. Another fact. This can result in men assuming that all women want a huge member and this is the key to good sex. Not true. The old adage, “It’s not the size that matters, but how you use it,” really is true and all you have to do to assure your BF of this is compliment him. Never underestimate the power of telling him that you love his member.

All you want to hear is dirty talk

Ok, so dirty talk is hot. But moderation is key and so is him knowing what you actually want to hear (think, “You are so completely sexy”, rather than, “You want it like a dirty w** don’t you”). Some dirty talk can be just plain offensive, so set the tone by talking to him how you’d like to be spoken to. If he starts dropping the “w”, “s” or “c” words then politely tell him that his potty mouth ain’t doing anything for you.